05:00:15 am on
Tuesday 19 Mar 2024

Fun in the Spring
Jennifer Flaten

I don't care if the calendar still says May. Summer has arrived. Last week we had a double whammy of high temperatures and humidity. It was so hot I found myself thinking fondly of snow and sub zero temperatures and you know how I feel about winter.

That's right, I am one of "those" people, you know the kind, in the winter we complain endlessly about how cold it is and then when the summer heat arrives we bemoan the soaring temperatures.

Just for the record, on super hot days, I also complain about the air conditioning being "too cold" in any given store/restaurant.

Yes, I am aware that some might view me high maintenance. I prefer to think of myself as charming. You man insert winsome smile, here.

In my defense, so far this spring has been unseasonably warm. I prefer to ease into summer with a few weeks of 75-degree days and 45-degree nights. What, you think it's weird to have exact temperatures? I know what I like.

As you know I am frugal, I do like that word so much more then cheap, so I haven't turned on the air conditioning-yet.

I really, really want to turn the air on but flipping on the air would be about as useful as standing in front of the open fridge-which the kids have tried on several occasions.

Built before insulation, and apparently, when energy was free for the taking, this house does an impressive job of letting the outside temperature inside.

Winter found us huddled in sweaters and layers of blankets, trying desperately to keep from turning into an ice cube. I began to view typing as an aerobic activity that prevented me from freezing solid.

All winter I kept myself warm with visions of hot summer days. Now summer, is here and I am sweating.

In fact, I am sweating right now as I type this and I don't like it. Although it gives me an awesome excuse for any typos-my finger slipped on a drop of sweat.

I have oscillating fans out; unfortunately, the animals have strategically placed themselves in front of all of them, thus blocking the cool air from actually reaching me.

I am the only one, in my household, who is unhappy with the excessive heat. The kids are thrilled.

The minute, really the minute, we were on mercury watch, the thermometer hit 80 the kids started campaigning for the pool.

Their campaign mainly involved begging me to get the pool out of storage. They did concede that if the pool was too much trouble they would settle for the slip and slide.

My only complaint about both the pool and the slip and slide is that they require inflation.

Luckily, we have an air compressor otherwise; it would take a really long time to inflate that pool.

Back to the kids and the pool, slip and slide, they have some elaborate plan in mind to link the pool and slide. They have a vision of their own little water park. I have visions of trips to the emergency room.

So far, I have put them off by suggesting they spray each other with the garden hose, while standing in or near the garden. Yep, I am killing two birds with one stone.

Jennifer Flaten lives where the local delicacy is fried cheese, Wisconsin. She writes about family life, its amusing or not so amusing moments. "At least it's not another article on global warming," she says. Jennifer bakes a mean banana bread and admits an unusual attraction to balloon animals and cup cakes. Busy preparing for the zombie apocalypse, she stills finds time to write "As I See It," her witty, too often true column. "My urge to write," says Jennifer, "is driven by my love of cupcakes, with sprinkles on top. Who wouldn't write for cupcakes, with sprinkles," she wonders.

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