01:50:06 pm on
Saturday 07 Dec 2024

Election Canada 2008
Bob Stark

When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace. Jimi Hendrix, musician, singer, and songwriter (1942-1970)

Four more days to decide whom to vote for.

You WILL vote. You have to go and vote. Even if you scribble nasty messages on the ballot, don ot

stay at home. VOTE! People have died for that right, don't abuse it, use it. TellĀ  'em the Clobber sent ya.

I admit I've been stuck on where to stick my own X.

I'll be frank. I usually vote for the brothers and sisters who brought us Medicare and such luminaries as Stanley Knowles and Stephen Lewis. But I'm getting tired of the same old message which has been merely slicked-up and sent to the Ball by a snake oil salesman.

Have I got a spiel for you!

Hello. My name's Clobber and I'm running for realism.

No way is Tar Sands Jack going to be Head Honcho. Cut the cutie-cake stuff Jacko. You should be talking about Smog not being Smug.

I may not know a hockey puck from a frozen horse turd but I get global warming/climate change.

I favour a Carbon Tax over the rather more nebulous Cap and Trade.

I've seen the latter in the NHL and after losing a season to a strike/lock-out, we're back to square one with prices and temperatures still rising. Draw your own concussions.

Who issues the permits? Who sets the targets? Who does the monitoring? I heard one NDP candidate - the guy in my riding, saying that the market will ensure it working. Huh? Let's claw back corporate tax breaks - that would actually help employ people and create jobs, if there were conditions attached (the clobber economic plan)- cause the free market can't be trusted BUT allow that same free market to govern emission reductions. From Adam Smith's invisible hand of the market place to Groucho Marxism ("Budget: a way of going broke methodically").No wonder the guy finished last in the voting at debate's end. If so many free-marketers are in favour of cap and trade, why is the NDP supporting it, when according to the Liberals most economists/environmentalists say the Carbon Tax is the best mechanism to curb emissions?

I'd rather be Green Shifted than Short-Shrifted.

This brings me to consider the Liberals and Heddy Fry - the woman who believes they burn crosses on the lawns and in the backyards in Prince George, BC. Okay, get yer head past Heddy - what a misnomer that is! - to the party and their leader.

I'll be blunt. Dion looks like a doorknob, sometimes acts like a doorknob, and wouldn't last 30 seconds in a real game on the pond, despite his surprisingly adequate mediocrity in road hockey. Send in the Hansen Brothers from the Charleston Chiefs ("Slap Shot") and the guy wouldn't be able to mangle either English or French! Okay, so here's what ya do. Ya turn-off the electronic aquarium and turn on the ole Marconi and listen to what the man actual says and how he says it. Nice guys may finish last in politics as well as in sports but this guy has to be the most decent, honest politician this country has had in quite some time. If this is a race think of a train race. and cast Dion as "the funny little man who could". No small consideration when one is putting down an X.

But then there's all that baggage the scandals .o-vey, this is not going to be easy.

Well, Pinocchio would definitely never get my vote. His nose has grown beyond the pale, even in the last few days! The man in the blue sweater is starting to sweat. What a deceptive vindictive little puppet he is. How can someone with such a supposed large intellect be so petty and small-minded? Is this leadership?

A firm hand on the till? Doesn't show panic? Doesn't show anything!! Everybody's happy in Mudville tonight. Don't worry, be happy.

In the States, it's "Yes We Can". In Canuckville with Harpoon, in expansionary recessionary times,the best he can give us in visionary foresight is"Buy low, sell high!!". Akin to Dubya's mantra to Americans after 9/11 - "go shopping."

How ironic that Mr. Control Freak won't let most of his caucus near a microphone for fear of what they might yelp and this gorf is spouting one stupid thing after another, and the hoi-polloi say "yes, but he did look prime ministerial in doing so ". What? Cause he's got a Ken and Barbie hair-cut from the 1950s that makes him look like Father Knows Best or Ozzie Nelson? So the guy can finger the piano a little .is this his fairy tale version of what you can aspire to as an artist in Canada, as he chops one government arts and cultural plan after another?

As I get it, he thinks a second minority is a sign that the people are behind him. Righty-o with pitch forks. He'll plow right ahead, interpreting it as being given a 'mandate' to govern. How arrogant is that?

Ontario!! The guys running his campaign are ex-Mike Harris guys - does this not scare you even a little bit!!

Is this the government you want in power during a recession who steadfastly refuses to go into deficit, like that is some communist plot into which we will forever be interred? Who promise endless tax breaks to corporations (I do have MY limits!)? Where will the money to fund rising health care costs come from? What government programs will be slashed, and then blamed on the state of the economy?

If we're headed for George F. Walker's"total shit future", I want a government with the option ideologically as well as morally to go into deficit-spending mode. A little more John Kenneth Galbraith and a little less Marie Antoinette "let 'em cake" please!

He blame the recent poll slides on his possible personality flaws. You're getting warmer Stevie boy, you're getting warmer!!

The mantra these days has been all governments should have legislated balanced budgets - families do. (I'm a single guy; I guess I don't count.)

Nonsense! There isn't a family I know who runs a balanced budget!! Everyone's in hock up to their plucked eyebrows .which is a small part of the reason for the credit crunch/collapse in the States!!

"Sign here Stupid."

"Duh yuck yuck Okay Dude!"

We've been living the champagne life-style on beer budgets (real income)for 40 years folks!

Let's cut the crap! No one balances their budget and everyone cheats on their Income tax. If the IMF were empowered to monitor YOUR family's budget, you'd be running to Hugo Chavez for advice.

Don't get me started!!!

Oh I've already started. Ah turning to the last straw man standing who just happens to be a woman. Elizabeth May.

As green as green can be; fiscally responsible, socially left of centre; tighten the belt but save the belt (strap); be positive, straight-shooting, and have a bit of the common touch. To serve the people, come from the people, be with the people, live with the people Take the A Train, Save the planet.

Works for me.

Me and Kermit are singing the Rainbow Connection and going Green .at least, for 4 more days.

Okay, maybe like sports, I gotta make a prediction. I truly believe that Harpoon will win a small minority but the Liberals and the NDP will have enough numbers to, and will form a coalition government. More on my reasons later if it's a mathematical possibility after the votes are counted.

VOTE!!!

Bob Stark is a musician, poet, philosopher and couch potato. He spends his days, as did Jean-Paul Sarte and Albert Camus, pouring lattes and other adult beverages into a recycled mug, bearing a long and winding crack. He discusses, with much insight and passion, the existentialist and phenomenological ontology of the Vancouver 'Canucks,' a hockey team, "Archie" comic books and high school reunions. In other words, Bob Stark is a retired public servant living the good life on the wrong coast of Canada.

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